Verbal Abuse

Words can cause lasting harm. That's not a metaphor — it's neurological fact. In children, sustained verbal abuse can cause the same damage to developing brain structures as physical or sexual abuse. The absence of visible injury doesn't mean the absence of injury.

This page focuses on the impact of verbal abuse on two groups particularly at risk: children, and older people.

In Children

Children are still forming their understanding of themselves and the world. Repeated verbal abuse — criticism, humiliation, threats, name-calling, being told they are worthless or unwanted — shapes that formation. The damage is not temporary.

Children who experience sustained verbal abuse are more likely to develop anxiety and depression, struggle with concentration and learning, withdraw from friendships or become aggressive in relationships, and carry the effects into adult life as chronic mental health difficulties, including PTSD and problems with trust and intimacy.

The harm is not about a single harsh word in a hard moment. It is about the pattern — what a child hears repeatedly, and what they come to believe about themselves as a result.

In older people

Older people are often dependent on family members or carers for practical support, which makes them particularly vulnerable to verbal abuse from those they rely on. It is frequently hidden — happening in private homes, minimised by families, or dismissed as the stress of caregiving.

The impact is serious. Verbal abuse in older people commonly leads to withdrawal from social contact, worsening of existing health conditions, deepening depression and anxiety, and a diminished sense of worth and agency at a stage of life when dignity matters most.

Older people who are being verbally abused often don't seek help — because they fear losing their care arrangements, because they feel ashamed, or because they have been told it isn't serious. It is serious.

"The neurological evidence behind this page is examined in depth in HKSG's 2017 research paper. [Read the full paper →]"

If this is your situation

If you are worried about a child in your household, or about an older person in your family or care, you don't need certainty before reaching out. A conversation is enough to start.

HKSG is not a crisis service — but we'll listen, help you think it through, and point you toward people who can do more if that's what's needed.

If there is immediate risk to a child or older person, contact the relevant authority directly. In NSW, mandatory reporting obligations apply to certain professions — but anyone can make a report if they have reasonable concerns.

If you are in immediate danger, call 000. For confidential support: 1800 RESPECT — 1800 737 732 (24 hours)

"In children it can cause the same neurological damage as sexual abuse."